Skeletons in the Closet

"Everything in life is mind over matter, if you don't mind it doesn't matter!"
I keep on seeking and finding almost every single day my individuality! Rationally I know it's all 'mind manageable', I'm on control of my own thoughts and decisions and I am the only one who can drive myself crazy. Therefore it's a daily life routine to fight my own ghosts, my skeletons hidden in the closet, it's up to me to shut them off for good... but it's a two steps forward and three steps back struggle...and I come across the fear that maybe 'the end has no end' almost every day! When I finally reckon that I am over something, I don't blame myself anymore and it's no longer making me lose any sleep, something triggers me again and then old ghosts meet new regrets!!
I wonder and wonder and wonder, trying to put an end to the stormy flush of selfish and narcissist thoughts that haunt me for years, I've done some major progresses and I've erased and rewind them again, and there's still a lot to be done! So I try to focus on the quote I wrote in the beginning, remembering that I am me, myself and I, and what I choose to do is a no concern to nobody, but still I find myself worrying sick about what others think... I would like one day to claim with certainty this "I just don't give a damn"...
But more recently I've been thinking about my whole life, my nostalgic memories, old and new friends, griefs and mournings, broken heart seasons, promises and betrayals, never ending lies, sorrow,regrets and mistakes... looking at pictures of all my growth and reading almost prehistorical chronicles I used to write! And after all this reflection process I have come to some kind of conclusion or as we might say a discovery... we can change our ways and paths, our decisions and tastes, our amends and compensations, we can improve or even become worse, it can happen naturally or with some enormous effort...but the essence, who we really are it never changes! So we may plan to change in a near future, we keep on re-scheduling our big big twist...we say: someday we won't be afraid of commitment, we will love fearlessly, we will be able to forgive ourselves and others!
But the truth is we keep on re-scheduling, we are stuck in ourselves, so we might as well accept it!! One day someone told me this: 'Here is the truth about the truth...it hurts so we lie'! But I don't want to do that, not to my family, not to my friends or my lovers, and specially to myself... I just don't feel like lying anymore... so face it:
we never change, do we? we never learn, do we?
No...

A METAPHOR

METAPHORS... It is quite funny, actually it isn't, that I have come across a bunch of metaphors I could 'bound' with during my life and when someone tells me to recall one and post it I just can't remember a thing!!! I confess that right now I am still unaware of what metaphor I am about to publish on my blog... it's not like writing this will help me to come up with anything! yada yada yada yada...and here I am hearing the echoing sounds of my hollow mind, yes I do hear them and don't u dare thinking that the pressure of remembering a metaphor is making me hallucinate...NO NO NO...for that I have drugs and booze...just kidding... yada yada yada...
'Ooh it makes me wonder/ooh it makes me wonder' ...I am still here and now I am singing the 'Stairway to Heaven' from Led Zeppelin...SEE SEE... I am not that short sighted or uneducated... I know Led Zeppelin... I know a lot of other too things I swear!!!!!But still I can't remember a metaphor!

30minutes later... Yeah I am still here... Night is falling down, people are leaving the computer room and I AM STILL HERE -.-

45minutes later... Thirsty... Hungry... Homesick...

1hour later... I hear them speak!!Wh0's there???Mummy I am scared!!!!!!!!!!!!

Finally:
Life is like a bagel. It's delicious when it's fresh and warm, but often it's just hard!

One Minute Presentation

Today I did my OT Presentation... and you are not gonna believe the topic I got!!!! 'How would my dream lover sound and act?'...now picture this said by Ian...always with that sarcastic tone on his voice(I must recall that this is nothing bad...not at all...I actually fancy the ironic remarks he does)...and so there I was, under this enormous unbearable pressure(I am actually being very sarcastic right now...since everybody knows I don't break under pressure...I am fearless =D)... So I had one single minute to describe how the love of my life would be...sure it sounds easy and manageable...but...that is only...because...in fact IT IS!!! Since there were only about 12 people on the classroom...I thought to myself I've gotta spread the word...Here it goes:
"My dreamlover...yami... A challenging tall ladd, with darkish hair, and beard.I love beard! He has to have a strong, manly voice and he definetely has to wear leather jackets. It's weird how that turns me on so much! I fancy some cocky hard attitude and killer look! A loud laugh, but a deep tender smile, cute but evil, sweet and spice, that irritates me but at the same time fascinates me! Tough and rough...THAT'T MY MAN!"

HEY HEY HEY

Well, I know I am late and I guess I should have posted the Digital Journalism Essay before...but it's never too late I guess! I am also aware that this 'introduction' should have come before the essay but I'm a disorganized mess as everybody knows!!!!! 'Theresaaaaaa' I think it is obvious why I chose this name for my blog(MY FIRST BLOG EVER =0)...and since it is obvious I shall not waste my time and yours explaining it! I'm afraid I'll be posting more boring things on this blog... it's not like I have a choice...just kidding! Till my next post... yes because this semester I must get a better grade (this one is for you, Ian)

Interpol's Unforgetable Skills

One of the most dangerous MOBS in Europe was finnally caught and dismantled by Interpol. This gang has been growing since the late 80s, by the hands of the manipulative and mind blowing gangster Don Vito, a cold blooded Sicilian. Don Vito started small, gathering his childhood friends and young brothers to little meetings in the center of the city of Trapani. Starting with small drug dealing businesses and also corruptedly managed restaurants of delicious pastas, they carried on expanding until they reached France and Spain. Spreading blood all over Lyon and Vigo, their powerfull net had control over almost one thousand restaurants and every drug dealing web, even the average street business. Planning for long months, Interpol placed a so called 'rat', an undercover police officer, in this dangerous gang. During a year, Antonin Aubry, gained Don Vito's trust and became one of his closer members, assisting the higher meetings that used to be just for the 'family'. In one of these meetings, the source Antonin Aubry, the bravest french Interpol Agent, lead the other agents to the place, an old grey building, where all gang would gather. Shots were fired, in the dark bricked room, Fabio Tagliano, Vito's oldest son and the 'rat', Antonin Aubry, were the only deaths to mark. Don Vito and the others, his brother Salvatore, his cousin Luigi Cerino and his oldest friend Fabrizio Ruspoli were arrested. Antonin Aubry's blood was all over Vito's proud shirt. After years of conspiracy, Interpol's eager victory bears the grieve for Antonin Aubry.